It's a coco-pops advert

Here are some pics from yesterday:

Yes we do work! The boys captured in a Jolly Phonics moment: "Do you want to come with me for a walk or do some of your workbooks?"





Yes, we have rabbits: two were allowed inside to star in a video/be shown on webcam to one of Joy's blogfriends. Joy's friend Imi came round all afternoon and they had loads of fun.




This was on Sunday, on our way back from the cinema. The boys have already seen The Golden Compass on DVD but I was really looking forward to seeing it, having read the books, and needed an excuse! And I wasn't dissappointed. I was engrossed, and enjoyed the characters: Nicole Kidman was a great Mrs Coulter, and that coyboy guy, what was his name? Interesting to see what they do with the other books.

It did cost me 18 quid, including the popcorn and cup of tea, none of which, I hasten to add, was split. Unlike the two other children we went with, who left a carpet of popcorn around ther seats and after we had left we found out they had left early. I don't know why I'm gloating at this, maybe because it is often assumed that you can't take my children anywhere, because they don't know how to behave (because they don't go to school [unspoken]). No, the funniest bit was when the second the adverts started this miserable old geezer in the row behind grumbled: "Can you sit down, I can't see". Kelly, who was settling her two boys in their seats just looked at him and said "It's a coco-pops advert". Maybe you had to be there.

Where is my ..... anyway?

Had another bimbling sort of day today, after being woken at several unreasonable times of the early morning and having put my head down for an hour or so before lunch/brunch? I walked down town with the boys to meet up with Clare and Lu at her exhibition and left some, hopefully, helpful and honest comments in the book. Had to go home to pick up Joy from the stables, but managed to bump into a few other friends, two of which came round for some late lunch/coffee/play. Looks like I've finally found a home for the deteriorating sink unit, then, and we might just get room on the drive for two cars by tomorrow, which is often needed when Meg has friends round.

So things are gradually moving again. I seem to be coming out of a fog (Dawn kindly pointed out to me the other day that she thought that "fog" was my constant state of mind and sounded surprised that I would be coming out of one!). Little corners of the house are being tidied up, like the top of the dresser cupboards in the kitchen, which have always been full of clutter, preventing easy access to the top cupboards. And stuff like that. I know it doesn't sound much, but as long as there seems like progress I'm happy.

Anyway, I was just having this conversation with my mum, in which I found myself saying "how hard can it be, putting up shelves, anyway, I mean I've got a drill, all I need to do is get a chuck key and find the spirit level and all the rest of the tools, and sort out all the tools, which will take about a day...." and so on. So, maybe I can do it, after all. I just need to do one thing at a time, and not be overwhelmed by it all. So I've just been trying to browse the IKEA website for shelves, which crashed Freddie's laptop. Where is my IKEA catalogue, anyway? Lost in the depths of... Meg's room?

She told me you can plant broad beans in February. I didn't know that. Where is my Gardening Calendar anyway? Somewhere in the depths of... I think it's called moving house. But I will get organised! Yes, potatoes Jerusalem artichokes, shallots, mmm? rocket. I need a greenhouse ideally (did you hear that, universe?) for tomatoes, and courgettes, no I think I can grow then in the suntrap at the front (heart sinks at the mess of the front garden). Take a d e e p breath...

I was trying to get inspiration for decorating my 1930's house: "cream and green, no, maybe that was 40's" I think the kitchen will be cream, and the floor's already green. I was thinking oyster, oyster satin, chrome, mirrors (bed and bathroom, obviously!) Art Deco? (No I'm not going 'the lady holding a ball' lamps). I'm contemplating a new bathroom. (gasp!) It needs decorating- it's shabby and the taps don't work properly, and it's blue. I'm a bit stuck on this one- I'm a bit scared of how much it's going to cost me to pay someone to do it, plus the hassle (my ex-plumber was a bit of a nightmare and the new one is a bit expensive). Maybe Kelly knows somebody? or Milly can help me? (Gill, I have mixed feelings about your bathroom pics: encouraging/hopeful/downright scary).

Anyway, first things first: Kitchen needs shelves pan rack, and wall needs painting, at least that wall, before I put those up, so a decision had to be made about that. So that's done: cream. Maybe I should leave it at that *sigh*, and concentrate on the kitchen, but I cant help thinking about all the other shelves that need putting up around, eg utility room, boy's room...

Ok it's time to go to bed with my paper.

O yeah, I just had a thought about the boys on the computers, as in: there are more educational things they could be doing apart from computer games, right? And it doesn't necessarily mean going out and buying CDroms? We seem to have lost the DK learning ladder 5-7 and don't really have much else, but I could take a bit more interest in what websites they are going to?

manana

bimbling

What have we been doing for the last week? Well, last Friday we made it over to Skipton to a home-ed meeting, where we had a play with some electrical ciruits from the STAR centre, plus saw some lovely old friends we havent seen for ages. That was me and the boys; Joy was up at the stables all day.

It's been a quiet week of bimbling around the house this week. We did the Hebden meeting, after some sound advice from a friend who knows: I decided to go along and open up and hang around for half an hour or so and leave if no-one else turned up. We ended up staying as there were a few things to sort out in the cupboard, Dave turned up and made me a coffee and the boys found the Duplo and got stuck into that. I even found the chalk (that walks); it had been borrowed and put away somewhere else, but I spotted it. Meanwhile some people turned up from Tod, very late but now at least they know it's on. Must set out earlier next week so we have chance to call in at the flea market on the way, as I'm sure there will be a few people coming.

It was funny when we left as we finished dead on time, which is exactly the same time that the school across the road comes out, so we found ourselves walking down the road with hoards of families, which was quite a novelty. I then had the idea that of course Dawn and Ro would be around, too, so we exchanged texts just as her van came round the corner and she gave us a lift home and came in for a good old chinwag and Ro played with the boys.

Yesterday I went out on my own for a haircut, and a good excuse to wander around Hebden aimlessly. I did get a new mouse, though, so now all the computers have one each! I got some new sketchbooks, too, the ones in the market for 99p that actually have nice thickish paper in, in the hope of inspiring a bit of non-computer based activity, which Fred and Joy both got into.

Today was a combination of computer games and Playmobil, which took off when Clare and Lu came round. By quarter to nine this evening (I'm a bit slack about bedtime when it's just me in for the evening) it had reached it's ultimate conclusion, that is, the Playmobil people were lined up on top of Freddie's laptop, along with a sea monster, watching the big screen. I couldn't get a picture as Freddie insisted on going to sleep with this going on, but now I've temporarily removed the audience so I can do this.

I am trying to upload some pictures to Flickr, as I am about 8 months behind in this, but my broadband connection is ridiculously slow. I am going to sack Pipex as soon as the contract runs out. Nick said he would get me a new router today, which might help, too. Yep, I new laptop would be nice, too...

happy valentines

Joy was up at the stables all day again we had a relaxed day with the boys at home. I was awoken by Freddie presenting me with a card he had made at Daddy's. When I got up he listed all the work he wanted to do today, which involved various kinds of collages. He must have enjoyed the sticking session we had at the Hebden Group yesterday, making Valentine's cards.

So we did an "R" collage, with a rhino, raspberries, red and roses; a sponge heart print (he had obviously been saving the heart-shaped sponges salvaged from Meg's bathroom box for such an occasion, though he didn't once mention that it was Valentine's day).
We also had a go at some monoprinting using a cotton bud to draw on the paint covered acetate.

Fergus did a dinasaur collage with tropical leaf background.

They played on computers for the rest of the afternoon and Dawn and Ro came round for a play/chat/tea. Dawn sang her latest song in the kitchen, which was lovely, and took some of my photo's of Callis for the LILO conference at CAT.

Joy was bushed when she came back- she was running round the paddock leading someone on a pony trotting when I arrived. She galloped yesterday, too. She's up there all day tomorrow, too; she's really enjoying it.

When I got them all to bed Nick cooked me a lovely meal and then decided to cash in his brownie points by indulging in his favourite pastime: WoW, which I don't mind, (although Meg said it should be banned on Valentine's), I think he's made a really good effort, plus it gives me time to blog, etc.

my beautiful compost heap

OK, it all started on Saturday, which was a perfect day of sunshine, strolling down to Hebden to pick up a paper and Clare's dog, taking in the little park on the way where the boys played battleships gleefully. I left my tea mug on a bench in the park but it had gone on the way back. Strange. Actually it was Gill's mug, from when we went camping a few years ago and I meant to return it, but now I never will.
Anyway, the afternoon was spent in the garden, which has been overwhelming me for all the soggy winter months, but I finally began to feel positive about it. I had chopped off an overgrown bush and this, among many other things needed tidying up. So, in the process I ended up mending the compost heap in a rather creative way, which I quite enjoyed, using bits of said chopped overgrown bush. Somehow I felt liberated from the shackles of mundane domestic life and momentarily saw glimses of hope for the future. Hope that I can be truly fulfilled being creative and, and... well, I can't quite remember it now, like I dream, its memory peters out before it gets to the good bit. But I have managed to keep myself going throughout the wobbles of the last couple of days, of which yesterday was totally wasted with an all day migraine. (no one else will accept that this was anything else than a hangover but I know, alright?).
So, today, after rather a late start, admittedly, which resulted from another late night after being in bed all day, I set about more garden tidying. I had decided on a couple of places to plant the willow I have been saving and this afternoon I dug in two rows of baby willow whips... in the front garden, with the hope of creating (finally) a bit of privacy in the best suntrap around.
So, that brought on a great sense of achievement. i hope the willow will take as it has been in water quite along time, but it looks alive and some of it is even sprouting pussy willow buds.
I also "dried" two loads of washing on the line. The children played at territorial games, such as locking each other in the chicken run and "you can't be in our gang unless you find me a coathanger". I think they made another treehouse later on but they were getting on my nerves too much with their constant bickering to intervene. I do wish they would get along.
I think I'll have to take them out tomorow, if only for a LIDL run. We need: hot chocolate, oregano, bread flour. Hmmm?
Wonder why I'm suddenly blogging again? well, kind of the same reason I started really, apart from Freddie's got a laptop and I can use it. (Actually I do have another old laptop but I seem to have lost the power supply and I think the wireless thingy doesnt work. No good then). Yep- if you can't beat 'em join 'em. I have a new, erm, boyfriend, who is so into World of Warcraft I just give up trying to talk to him. What's the point in it really? Exactly. Bla bla bla, so I've been on Facebook, Myspace, you name it, what else can you do?

maintenance, not progress

OK, yeah, I got the food and the rabbit hutch, on Monday. Yesterday was dedicated to pancakes, but as I'm restricted to using whichever child's computer I can get near, I don't have a system for uploading photographs; maybe later.

So, as you may have gathered by my tone, I'm feeling more than a little frustrated with life. Not down or depressed, or stressed, just frustrated and bored. I just never get anything done. It's always two steps forwards and three steps back. OK we are in Mercury Retrograde; I should get over it. I mean all I have done this week is try to keep up with housework and the things which accumulate over time, like the need for more rabbit hutches. This is Maintenance, not Progress.

Thing is, I'm so overwhelmed by what needs to be done I don't know where to start. I go intio the garden and am overwhelmed by what needs to be done there; I go back inside and am overwhelmed by what needs to be done there, too. Every little job turns into a huge obstacle, which has got to be got over before I can start to tacke the next. i can never get the kids to all go out out once and I can't leave any of them on their own, so sometimes I just give up but then I get stuck because I haven't got that little nut and bolt, or the chuck key from the hardwear shop, which I can nearly see from my house but can't get to without the mammoth efferot of dragging three reluctant little people down the hill and back again.
Anyway, I get to this point on a Wednesday afternoon and think, O well, only an hour or so and they'll be gone to their dad's, and then I'll be able to think, and use a computer without being hassled (I'm still being hassled even though there's more than one PC for every person in the house at the moment). 'cept I won't think- I'll have a bath, and go out, and forget and try and cheer myself up and not be bored.

Yeah, OK, we made a letter 'r' out of cardboard, Freddie and me. He wanted to make it because it's part of 'Fred', which, I suppose is a good enough reason.

I just want to get this house sorted out becase it's bugging me to hell. I need shelves. attatched to walls. Other people can do it, what can't I? well, partly because this house is so small that to move or find anything is like one of those puzzles where you can only move one square at a time to the space next to it.

back to treacle-wading

O, why did the groundhog picture do that? I re-uploaded it, too. (don't know about you but I can only see it's eyes)

I'm feeling a bit feeble at the moment. Just had to sit in front of the fire with my feet up. I've sent Nick out for emergency suppplies but he left it too late to get any decent chocolate. Ahh well.

The children came back from Oasis at 1pm sharp- not long enough after I had got up. They were quite subdued, though, after all that swimming, and archery, etc.

(...ahh, that's better...I finally can relax now I have everything I need)

I went out in the garden with Freddie this afternoon and cleared a bit of space for the trampoline. I also hacked down a massive bush that's in the way of where I'm planning to put the washing line. No idea what it is, it had big yellow leaves when we arrived and was about 7 foot tall, now 3. I think it was that bit of exertion that has made me feel tired now. I really should be still hibernating.

Done a bit of Facebooking, as usual. Been on the phone to Clare. Finally got to read the Saturday Guardian this morning. I just couldn't sit still all weekend- had a bit of an ecclectic couple of days, catching up with loads of people ending up with a yorkshire pudding fest round at Mel's last night, but it wasn't a late one as she had work today. No-one in this house has work at the moment. I suppose that's quite nice not having the Monday morning jar. Didn't even feel the need to make a to-do list today, but I can feel one coming on as I have to face up to a few glaring facts:
1. Fergus has no pyjamas
2. We are nearly out of food (although I did manage to rustle up some pizzas with the contents of the larder, which included a jar of asparagus, some sweetcorn and pinapple for the kids' one. I think we had mozzarella, red onions, yellow pepper, tomato and capers- ok, huh?)
3. There is a rabbit living in the utility room, where the old cooker used to be and where the rapidly-deteriorating sink unit needs to go.
So, tomorrow, or ASAP, or manana, I need to get a rabbit hutch, some pyjamas and food, which can only mean Halifax: Pets at Home, the indoor market or Woollies, and LIDL. Hey, maybe I could go to Wilco while we're at it, and Home Bargains is next to Petsathome...., hey, now, hold on, hold on, Steady now, easy does it. One thing at a time, well, three...

One thing that has been on my mind again today is: Why do they fight? I saw Joy laying into Fergus with my own eyes and when I asked him if she was doing it all weekend he said no. No, she only does it at home. Which got me thinking. A lot. So is it aimed at me? Attention-seeking behaviour? Thing is I remember she started doing this when she was at school. She would come in and after a few steps in through the door she would be hitting Fergus. And I just put it down to the fact that she had been at school all day and .... But she was 5 then and now she is 10. I always start to blame myself for her behaviour, put it down to my shortcomings as a parent. O, I'm so hard on myself and then I feel bad about myself and that just lowers my confidence and my ability to cope with the situation. Thing is sometimes i can't cope with her when she's just being her- loud and talkative and full up silly questions, and that's about me. But if she senses that I don't like it when she's like that and thinks I don't like her, well, maybe that could be having some effect.
I suppose it could also be to do with growing up in a home environment which was far from peaceful, and there is also Meg, who is fairly level most of the time, but tends to lose it with the kids quite easily and I've only just realised she has got this (partly) from her dad, who is very shouty with his 4 year-old, and I expect he must have been the same with her, although we never did parenting at the same time, so I never really knew what he was like with his own kids, strangely, until recently.

Anyway, that went off on a bit of a tangent, didn't it? loads more I could rant about but I'm feeling a little bit tired now. Think I'll just sit and read for a bit.
Someone told me that if you swim through treacle you go as fast as swimming through water. Now I can't quite believe that, can you? (don't answer that)

groundhog /Imbolc

Aw, isn't he cute?

Well we all know it's Groundhog Day today, don't we? So why don't we celerbate groundhog day here, or have any apparent interest in it whatsoever? Well, someone did say Happy Imbolc to me yesterday at my Taichi class, and, as you may know, Imbolc is basically the same festival: half way between winter and spring, and Groundhog Day comes from Candlemas, which I'm sure comes from Imbolc. It just makes sense.

So far so good. Well, it just occurred to me, pancake day being only next week, that pancake day is also the same festival, except it's calculated back from Easter, the date of which is influenced by the lunar and weekly cycles (ie, Easter Day being the first Sunday after the first full moon after the spring Equinox). But who the hell says so? The Pope? And when do we celebrate it? It's all so dissipated. I mean I'm all for everyone doing their own thing and all, but where's the meaning? and what's the point in celebrating if we don't know what we're celebrating and we aren't doing it together?

OK: back to groundhogs. For those of you who don't know: it's basically one of those weather prediction days. If it's sunny that means there's going to be another 6 weeks of cold weather and the groundhog (AKA woodchuck) is meant to pop his head out of hibernation and if he sees his shadow he goes back inside again, knowing the winter's not over yet. It doesn't have to be a groundhog; we don't have them here, do we? Anyway, so, guess what? it's sunny today for the first time in ages! So, I guess my hibernating days are not over yet.

It snowed here last night, too. I might just go and take some pictures for you instead of festering inside. O and feed the rabbits, of course. See, the children aren't here. They're in Penrith with Daddy and Daddy's girlfriend. I bet it's snowed there.

Happy, urm ....day, whatever floats your boat.